"I saw a very pious and holy looking monk passing by me to take a bath in the river. I asked him his name and he said, pointing at his chest, " People call this body Swami Chidananda."

Ans. : Until I was fifteen years of age, I did not know much about spirituality. My household was religious but not especially spiritual. There was an old temple near our house in a dilapidated condition, but it had a lovely statue of Krishna. Some people formed a committee in the village and began worship in the temple. Out of curiosity I went; the best part was getting prasad! The priest made the prasad so nicely and I would come only for that. I wanted to win the favor of the priest there by doing small tasks for him. I got on his good side and he would feed me whenever I came. Many of the people visiting the temple were interested in the Ramayana and the Mahabharta, and one person would sing the slokas and another person would expound on the meaning. These epics may appear to be just stories, but the highest Vedanta philosophy runs through them. This life I had in this temple help lead me to the spiritual life. I so much admired the example of Hanuman and the beautiful way he served Lord Rama. This inspired me very much.

Gandhiji told us to give up our education in the British system and join in the freedom movement. As a result, one year I didn't take exams and I also went to obstruct other students from taking their exams in order to agitate for freedom. We were with the last batch of volunteers. I was arrested and put in Mysore jail for three months for this boycott-I was essentially a political prisoner. While in the jail we did prayers and meditation in the morning. We were put to hard labor, but we also did volunteer work while in jail. I was eventually released from jail and India got independence in 1947. In my 18th year, it was 1952 to be exact, I came to Mysore for higher studies in history, but I never had any plans for a career. My roommate was a very spiritual person and he asked me to come to the Ramakrishna Mission on Ekadashi day, and a short Nama Rama Ramayana was being chanted there. This affected me very much and I would go everyday to hear the prayers and bhajans. For two years I associated with them and I came to know the monks, and I also read books from Sri Ramakrishna and Swami Vivekananda.

Again, I had no interest in taking a job or leading the worldly life. A wave of dispassion came over me, and one day I just bundled up the books and possessions that I had and sent a note to my parents saying, "Don't look for me." I left that place and decided to come to the Himalayas, and for 14 years my parents did not know where I was. This sounds harsh, but one must have nerves of iron and muscles of steel to tread this path. I had heard that Haridwar and Rishikesh were holy places, and I wanted to come here. I had a little money of my own with which to travel, so in 1953, at age 19, I traveled for six or seven days by train to come here. I arrived in winter; I didn't speak Hindi and did not have any winter clothes and did not know anyone to help me. I would sleep anywhere I could, and I eventually found the Dattatreya Mandir up on a hill above the Ganges and I stayed there for a while.

Every day I saw a very pious and holy looking monk passing by me to take a bath in the river. One day this man was suddenly standing in front of me as I sat by the Ganges bank. He asked me where I was from, and when I responded that I was from Mysore, he spoke to me in my own language. I asked him his name and he said, pointing at his chest, " People call this body Swami Chidananda." He took me to see Gurudev who said, "Ohji, stick to this place. Don't run away. Serve Swami Chidananda and you will attain everything."

Skilled typists were needed in the Ashram and I learned typing from a cardboard pattern, as there were not enough typewriters to go around. I knew that if I could work as a typist I would have a chance to constantly be in the presence of Gurudev. I had satsang with him for ten years until 1963, and I would also see him in the office. Gurudev would meet visitors in the morning, bless packets of books before they were sent, and afterwards he would sign letters. He was a mass of bliss. We had such reverence for him and would not speak to him without first being spoken to. I was never conscious of my progress or myself; we were so caught up with service that we couldn't think about ourselves-it was just service, as that was truly my sadhana. We just learned from Gurudev's life. His life was his teaching. I had thought originally that I would be sitting fourteen years in meditation like in the Scriptures, but it was not that way. After Gurudev's mahasamadhi in 1963, I felt that he had transcended the physical form and was now available for all of us. He manifest by bringing people to this Ashram in very subtle ways. This Ashram is a manifestation of his presence. Some mysterious power is guiding us at every step.

I started touring with Swami Chidananda as his personal assistant in 1963 and continued to serve in that capacity until 1996. From 1963 to 1968 I toured with Swamiji in India and then from 1968 to 1996 I was with him when he was invited to foreign countries. Swamiji was not all affected by the West. He went there only because he was invited; he was in fact hesitant to go. Swamiji strictly obeyed poverty, chastity and obedience and all the sannyas ideals. I learned many things in my travels with him. Among many others, I learned to be more deeply rooted in the divine, as I saw this trait in him constantly. For instance, I never once said to him, "How are you?" because I never considered him to be a body. I also never asked him any spiritual questions as I just listened to his discourses and watched him live his life. He seemed to be persistently urging people to do some specific things: constantly remember death, remember the saints, do sadhana, and do study of great books written by realised saints. His spirit of service was extraordinary-nothing was too menial for him. We were once walking along a sidewalk and all the others passed by it. Swami Chidananda stooped to pick it up and put it to the side so that no one would slip. Such humility-he would always greet others first and bow to all people. He would do great service in the Ashram, whatever the work might be.

As I mentioned before, all my sadhana in the early years-all my meditation, japa, and contemplation-consisted only of service, and now it was to the great Swami Chidananda. I was so attracted to him; if he did not come back at night I would go in search of him. For instance, if I found him off in the forest meditating, I would wait off to the side, and when he had finished I would accompany him home. Swamiji said so many times, "I am not this body and mind," and at some point this went into my head.

The Lord made it possible for Swami Chidananda to go to see those people who could not come to India. Some only heard with one ear, as seeds sometimes fall on stony ground. Though it may not help in this birth, it will aid them in a later life. One should not blame anyone. Many people ask me about living in the world, and I respond that once a person is established in a higher state, it doesn't matter where the person is. You can create your own environment, and there be a true seeker. Then it is only between you and the divine-the outside circumstance don't matter so much. Wherever God has placed you, there you can lead a spiritual life. Maybe people will be served by your presence back home. Coming or not coming to the Ashram is the will of the divine. If through the divine will you are meant to eat the food of this place, you will, but if you are not meant to come here, you will never eat even one morsel from this place.

You have asked me about sannyas. There are four stages in life (student, householder, retirement and renunciate (sannyas)), but one can transcend them and go straight to sannyas. Gurudev asked me when I would take sannyas, and I said that I was unworthy. Later in 1972 I took sannyas. I felt I would have more responsibility to carry on the spiritual life if I were a sannyas.

I am content to stay here; I do not need to travel anymore. I have over 1,000 cassettes of the discourse of Swami Chidanandaji. I would like to listen to all of them at least once!